The Tale of Lady Godiva

... from the Deflores Historiarum, as chronicled by Roger of Wendover.

The following dialogue as recounted by Roger of Wendover, including:

John of Wallingford (abbot of St Albans Abbey)
Matthew of Westminster (Benedictine monk and English chronicler)
Adso of Melk (Benedictine novice)
Roger of Wendover (English chronicler)


Incipit comedia Deflores Historiarum

John of Wallingford: May 12th, 1006 .... Coventry, England. The people of that town were suffering grievously under the oppressive taxation of Leofric III, Earl of Mercia and lord of Coventry. His wife, the fair Lady Godiva appealed again and again to her husband, who repeatedly refused to remit the tolls. At last, weary of her entreaties, he said he would grant her request if she would ride naked through the streets of the town. Lady Godiva took him at his word, and after issuing a proclamation that all persons should keep within doors or shut their windows, she rode through nude, with only a clothed lady attendant leading the horse by the reins.

Matthew of Westminster: On that day, everyone in town obediently kept within their houses with their doors, windows and curtains shut. As Godiva and her attendant came down the center street towards the town square, they passed the tailor’s shop. Now they passed the tailor’s ... [cut to the Zapruder tapestry] ... the attendant leading the horse …

John of Wallingford: A moment later, something happened that changed the town of Coventry in a deep and profound way from that day forward.

Adso of Melk: What was it?

Matthew of Westminster: Tom the Tailor peeped .... and Lady Godiva screamed out, "Someone’s peeped!"

John of Wallingford: Then her attendant turned to her mistress and saw Tom the Tailor peeping through his recently procured Venetian shutters.

Matthew of Westminster: That instant, Tom the Tailor was struck blind by God.

Adso of Melk: What a tale!

Roger of Wendover: Unfortunately the immutable laws of Aristotelian physics contradict the whole premise of your tale - entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem. Allow me to recreate this story by scholasticism - via disputatio - if I may for young Adso as I've heard this tale recounted numerous times.

Father John, Brother Matthew, if you'll permit me. According to the tale you tell Lady Godiva is riding pass the tailor’s shop and then you say that she was peeped upon from the back right side. The attendant, leading the horse out front, quickly turns backs towards her mistress, and sees a peep coming from the tailor’s shop on the right, just behind them. The peep would then have had to have been seen by Lady Godiva facing frontward on the horse and also the lady attendant who having turned backward to face her mistress, sees the peeper, causing her to drop the horse’s reins. A peep seen from two opposing directions at once? That is one magic peeper.

John of Wallingford: That's the way the story is told.

Roger of Wendover: What happened to Lady Godiva’s head when she noticed the peep?

Matthew of Westminster: Well, uh, well, in embarrassment, her head went back and to the left.

Roger of Wendover: Again.

Matthew of Westminster: Back and to the left.

Roger of Wendover: Back and to the left. Back and to the left.

Adso of Melk: What are you saying?

Roger of Wendover: I am saying that the peep could not have come from behind ... that there had to have been a second peeper behind the bushes ... at the dirty stable. If the peeper was behind Lady Godiva, as you tell, it that would have caused her head to turn away forward in embarrassment.

Adso of Melk: So the peep could have only come from the front and to the right.

Roger of Wendover: But that is not what they would have you believe - quod erat demonstrandum.

John of Wallingford: I shall tarry no longer! Roger is a heretic! [begins to depart slowly]

Matthew of Westminster: Father John, Father John! [goes after]

Roger of Wendover: The sad ending is that, in this life, we may never know the real truth.

[Matthew of Westminster takes John of Wallingford by the arm and leads him out]


Translated by PC from the Codex Godivae (or The Godiva Code), 11th century manuscript in the Bodleian Library (Douce manuscript 207).